Working Woman

So I have been back at work for about 2 months now. Unfortunately ( or Fortunately if you are a preggo in cville) , we haven't had very many babies at work lately. I havent had much of a chance to actually do patient care. And let me tell you, I like doing the schedule, but taking care of a  23 weeker is more of my cup of tea than staring at a computer screen of numbers all day.

Everybody has said that having a baby changes everything. And yes they are right in all the normal, expected ways ( inability to eat in restaurants, so excited to get three things on a to do list done, drying my hair is still a daily accomplishment, etc.) But the place it has changed me the most is at work. I have never been much of a crier, and at work to say the least I am always a little cynical. However since the Jack Jack came along, working is a whole new ball game. My first week back I took care of a little man, and when I asked his mom if she wanted to hold him, she starting crying, then I was crying. It was ridiculus. I never cry at work, even when  my primaries die. Yes the baby was very sick, and yes she had never held him, but seriously. I blamed that little emotional outburst on hormones. But it is continuing on, I can not stand to hear a baby cry or fuss without comforting him (I know that doesn't sound out of the ordinary but if you work in the NICU, you get that sometimes they just have to cry). I have patience for kiddos at work that never ends. I tear up when we take the babies away right after birth (even though obviously we need to) because the mom doesnt get to love on them. I have basically become a blithering mess. Clearly, jack has changed me and I think in the long run it is going to make me a much better nurse, at least a more understanding nurse to the parents. Dont get me wrong, I was a pretty awesome nurse before hand :) and I have always been a fan of letting parents hold. Now I get it though and it breaks my heart to think if that was me and Jack in that situation. Everyone who says having a baby changes you is right. And it words that are unexplainable, it is 100% for the better.


No worries though,  do not think that it has changed me in how and what I feel should be done, I'm still pretty cut and dry in what I would want done for my baby. I havent completely lost it. yet...